uname -a
Linux informatican 3.1.8-1 #1 SMP PREEMPT Jan 1 03:03:08 UTC 1986 Human Male Brain Compound CPU GenuineHuman GNU/Linux

cat /proc/cpuinfo 
processor	: 0
vendor_id	: GenuineHuman
cpu family	: 1
model		: 87
model name	: Human(R) Male(TM) Brain Processor
stepping	: 1,5
physical id	: 0
siblings	: 2
core id		: 0
cpu cores	: 2
coma_bug	: only on weekends
flags		: h2o C8H10N4O2 omg wtf ftw lol nope work stfu pebcak etc
power management: Variable caffeine input frequency scaling

processor	: 1
vendor_id	: GenuineHuman
cpu family	: 1
model		: 87
model name	: Human(R) Male(TM) Penis Processor
physical id	: 1
core id		: 0
cpu cores	: 2
flags		: party fap fapfap sex blow fuckyeah 
power management: Not supported


cat /proc/interrupts 
           CPU0       CPU1       
  0:   64127423          0   IO-APIC-edge      wirstwatch
  1:      11597          0   IO-APIC-edge      hungry
  8:          1          0   IO-APIC-edge      alarmclock
  9:      79314          0   IO-APIC-fasteoi   need-toilet
 12:     956327          0   IO-APIC-edge      need-caffeine
 14:     272649          0   IO-APIC-edge      incoming e-mails
 15:          0          0   IO-APIC-edge      important incoming e-mails
 16:    4985918          0   IO-APIC-fasteoi   incoming tweets, bargain app
 17:          0          0   IO-APIC-fasteoi   Facebook-messages
 18:          0          0   IO-APIC-fasteoi   completed tasks at work
 19:        845          0   IO-APIC-fasteoi   change playing song on youtube
 44:          0          0   PCI-MSI-edge      some woman came bursting in
 45:    2242446          0   PCI-MSI-edge      boss came bursting in
 46:          2      12748   PCI-MSI-edge      NSFW